1. |
Before You're Dead
03:35
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4am again, aching head and crawling skin
Focus on the ceiling, not the walls closing in
The silence only broken by the sirens on the wind
A little lullaby from the east side
So this is your answer to everything that’s gone wrong?
Just keep your head down, It’ll work out for everyone…
But there’s an emptiness inside your chest
That you’ve filled with anger and regret
The only beating you hear now is your hands upon your head
Desperately pleading for relief
The only thing you really need is just to breathe
All the hurt that you hide inside is pouring out your eyes
All those walls that you’ve built up will not keep you warm at night
Lay down your arms
Lay down your head
Fill up that void
Build a fire there instead
And, just maybe, you’ll find some time for life before you’re dead
Now, that screaming that you hear is just your conscience
And that ringing in your ears is fucking constant
Got that lump inside your throat
Your father’s voice, and your mother’s tone
Though you tried hard, you never quite forgot them
The only time you’re wasting is yours
By constantly knocking on unlocked doors
These words are just words, not calls to war
All the hate that you hide inside is pouring out your eyes
All those walls that you’ve built up will not keep you warm at night
Lay down your arms
Lay down your head
Fill up that void
Build a fire there instead
And, just maybe, you’ll find some time for life before you’re dead
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2. |
Little Black Dress
03:43
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Sometimes I fear I was just a pawn in your game
Most days I feel pretty Ok, it being that way
Let’s keep this sacred and secret, if it’s all the same
Though I feel no shame
I fear no blame
It just seems better that way
I, oh my, I tried
Did my very best
At keeping the seething inside of my head
Because I know you didn’t need it,
And nobody could see it driving me insane
I’m on the tracks, you’re a runaway train
Run away my way…
I’ll be yours, if you’ll be my little white lie
Some secrets, we take them as far as we must
Actions to ashes and lust into dust
A little white lie in a little black dress
Does terrible things to my heart and my head
I’m losing my mind as I’m losing my breath
A little white lie in a little black dress
A pretty little bird on a barbed wire fence
The siren of which all sailors are warned
The unstoppable object
The immovable force
I tried to let it go
I tried to let it pass
But that engine is closing fast and I’m lashed to the tracks
Oh, what a trap.
I’ll be yours, if you’ll be my little white lie
..A little white lie in a little black dress
Does terrible things to my heart and my head.
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3. |
100% Interest
04:32
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Little Katie’s crying in the garden
With a little spade to hide her dear departed
She’s only just learned of lack of permanence
That “life” and “love” are present tense
She mourns a fairground fish, I mourn her innocence.
Late at night, Danny’s crying for his mama
Full of fright and he swears he’s heard a monster
Little does he know that here’s none under his bed
Not in his closet or his head
Danny’s daddy’s just grown horns, growled and made his mama dead
They say, you know, we are all debtors and one day we have to pay
There’s no choice in this,
We accrue interest and get deader by the day.
There’s a million points of light, stuck in the inky black of night
Choose the one to guide your way, but even stars burn out some day
What will you have to say for yourself,
If we reach the end to find there’s no heaven and no firey pits of hell?
Pray tell, will you say you still lived well?
They say, you know, we are all debtors and one day we have to pay
There’s no choice in this,
We accrue interest and get deader by the day.
We just simply exist, hand-to-mouth and -over-fist
Until there’s nothing left to save
So don’t waste your days away.
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4. |
Double Negative
05:02
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It’s tough to grasp happiness with a balled-up fist
It just doesn’t work like this
Why don’t you make a list
Of all the reasons why
You hate the world outside
Crumple it up real tight
And swallow it with your pride
We’ve all got our demons, white lies and deep dark secrets,
Shoeboxes and closets full of bones
Be it powders or pills,
Elixers or smoke,
Or the mountain of bills piling up to your throat
Oh, I know fully fucking well, your head’s as good as any cell
A little perfect private hell we build ourselves
If you’re always angry about being angry
You might never not be…
A dialtone, five rings and an answering machine
“Hi we’re not home..”
I hang up just before the beep.
I start to tense up right around ring two or three
By the time it gets to my part, I have not the breath to speak
We’ve all got these places we pack full of shit that we don’t need
It builds up and fills up, neglecting the need for room to breathe.
(bridge)
Sometimes I drink because I drink too much, to numb the aching in my head
Sometimes I smoke because I smoke too much to help with the stress of shortened breath
I have removed my heart from on my sleeve and stuffed it back inside my chest,
So when it bursts from the anxiety, it won’t make such a mess.
I hate that I am hateful
I get too sad to be depressed
I am still sick and tired of being sick and tired
I am so full of regrets
And I am sorry that I am sorry
And if I don’t call, it’s just I don’t know what I’d say
Not that I don’t love you and miss you and hope that you’re ok
I’m still chasing rabbits
Making and breaking habits
Trying to be happy about being happy
So that I might never not be…
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